I'm recycling an old journal from CafeMom because I feel like there's someone who may need to read it today. Enjoy!
A good friend posted something on Facebook yesterday. She was talking about how someone had blocked her in at an after-school parent function and how she had a hard time getting her large SUV out of the lot because one person parked in such a way to hinder everyone else's departure. She had a handful of comments below, including one from myself about people having Cranio-Rectal Syndrome and think the world revolves around them. Another person commented that it would be nice to just delete some people so they wouldn't be a bother. I was amused at first as I imagined a giant mouse and cursor. I could see a big hand dragging across the person to highlight them and subsequently hitting the delete key to rid the person and their bothersome ways from our lives.
Then, later, I thought about it some more. And suddenly it took on a new meaning for me.
What if we could delete people that have caused us hurt, heartache, anguish or pain? Would that really be the best course of action? Would deleting the person also delete the torment or pain they've caused us? I think it's best when those people (please read: I'm not referring to serial killers, rapists, child molesters, etc) are allowed to remain in our memory and, in a way, to forever be a part of our make-up. There's a famous quote by Tennyson that says, "I am a part of all I have met." It just means that every person we've ever run into or said hello to or had a deep meaningful relationship with makes us who we are today, right now, in this very moment. I think people are placed in our lives for a reason. To enable us to grow, to learn, to experiment. If we "deleted" them from our "hard drive", we'd be a bunch of reckless fools running around making the same mistakes time and time again.
I have persons in my past who do not bring up fond memories. Some from long ago, some from more recent times, some in the past year. If I delete the memory, I lose the wisdom and the lessons I gained from each experience. I think those lessons benefit me in the making of new memories with new people. We have to be able to step out in faith even when we're hurt and burned beyond recognition.
Time heals all wounds. Maybe my friend will be able to offer a smile or a handshake to the idiot who blocked everyone in the parking lot. Maybe I'll be able to not let those bitter memories hinder me, but instead use them to move forward and chalk it up to a learning experience. Time will tell. After all, time heals all wounds; and isn't healing sort of similar to deleting?